This page is the transcript for the Season 1 Episode Tea at the Treedome. If you are looking for the episode then click here: "Tea at the Treedome."

Note: All transcripts are completely original and have not (nor ever will) been copied from and other sources.



  • (The episode opens up at Jellyfish Fields where SpongeBob is hiding behind a bush. A Jellyfish floats by him. SpongeBob comes from behind holding a Telescope. Camera cuts to SpongeBob)
  • SpongeBob: Wow, four stingers. (He put's the telescope away and puts on his glasses. Scene cuts to the Jellyfish where SpongeBob heads over to it. He moves closes and tries to catch the Jellyfish with the net but unfortunately he get's himself caught in the net and the Jellyfish flies off. A groan is heard from the background. SpongeBob runs to the edge of a cliff to see what is going on. He sees a Land Squirrel trying to fight a Giant Clam. SpongeBob gasps) Where have I seen this before? (He takes out a Field Guide book and flips through the pages to find the right page) Here it is! (The camera zooms into a picture of a Squirrel) Land squirrel. (He shuts the book) That little squirrel is in trouble. (The camera cut's to the Squirrel's end smashing the Clam into the ground)
  • Squirrel: Take that, you sorry old clam! Y'all need to learn some manners! (She walks off wiping her hands) You're about as ugly as homemade soup. (Scene cuts to SpongeBob's end)
  • SpongeBob: Hooray, land squirrel! (The camera cuts back to the Squirrel's end where the Clam jumps out of the sand and at onto the Squirrel. Scene cut's to SpongeBob's end where he is in shock and his glasses come off) Look out! (Scene cuts back to the Squirrels end with the Squirrel trying to escape the clam) Hold on, little squirrel! (SpongeBob runs down a long slope and heads to the clam. He makes a few Karate noises and bounces from different sides. To finish he jumps on top of the clam) You have fought well, giant clam. Prepare to be vanquished! Hai! (He attempts to pry open the mouth of the clam. It seems to be working) Hey, I'm actually doing it. (He continues to pry it open. It turns out that the Squirrel was doing it the whole time. When the Clam's mouth is open SpongeBob goes flying into a sea plant. He get's out) Your shell is mine! (He lifts his pants up and charges at the clam. He jumps onto his tongue. He tries to squeeze it's tongue but discovers that the Squirrel is holding the Clam's mouth apart. The strength of the Squirrel's arms is unable to hold the mouth apart which mean the mouth get's shut and the Squirrel bounces off the Clam. SpongeBob has been swallowed by the Clam)
  • Squirrel: Hold on there, little square dude! (She runs to the clam, Kicks it causing it to start spinning, Kicks it again so SpongeBob escapes from it's mouth then kicks far away from where they are standing. The Squirrel goes to see if SpongeBob is ok)
  • SpongeBob: Hey, you like karate too! (SpongeBob does a bunch of Karate moves then stops but falls on his head) So, uh, what's your name?
  • Squirrel: Sandy! (She also does a bunch of Karate moves) Your show.
  • SpongeBob: (He runs up a big rock and jumps off it) I'm SpongeBooooooooooob! (He lands on one of his corners)
  • Sandy: Well SpongeBob, take a gander at this! (She walks to a giant boulder and hits it with her hand. A gong sound is heard and the rocks crumples then explodes)
  • SpongeBob: Oh. Oh yeah? Watch this! (SpongeBob is about to do some Karate but instead squeezes his armpit to make a fart instead. Sandy walks to SpongeBob laughing)
  • Sandy: I like you, SpongeBob. Why, we could be tighter than bark on a tree. Hi yah! (She karate chops Spongebob making a dent on his head)
  • SpongeBob: Uh, I like you too, Sandy. Hi yah! (He tries to chop her but get's hit by her helmet) Ow. Say, what is that thing on your head?
  • Sandy: Why, that's my air helmet.
  • SpongeBob: May I try it on?
  • Sandy: Heck, no. I need it to breath! I gotta have my air.
  • SpongeBob: Me too! I love air! Air is good.
  • Sandy: No kidding?
  • SpongeBob: Why, "air" is my middle name! The more air, the better! Can't get enough of that air.
  • Sandy: Shee-oot. How about coming over tomorrow for tea and cookies then? (She hands SpongeBob a map which gives directions to Sandy's House) Don't be late!
  • SpongeBob: Okay, see you tomorrow. (When Sandy walks off, SpongeBob runs to Patrick's house who appears to be sunbathing on his rock) Patrick! Patrick! Patrick, Patrick, Patrick! What's air?
  • Patrick: Huh?
  • SpongeBob: I just met this girl! She wears a hat full of... air!
  • Patrick: (He takes off his glasses) Do you mean she puts on "airs"?
  • SpongeBob: I guess so.
  • Patrick: Thats just fancy talk. If you want to be fancy, hold your pinky up like this! (He puts his pinky up) The higher you hold it, the fancier you are!
  • SpongeBob: (Holding pinky up) How's that?
  • Patrick: Higher!
  • SpongeBob: (Raises pinky up higher) Like that?
  • Patrick: Now that's fancy! They should call you SpongeBob FancyPants! (Scene fades to Sandy's Treedome with Spongebob and Patrick walking there. SpongeBob is still holding his pinky up) Remember: When in doubt, pinky up! You can do it, SpongeBob. I'll be watching. (Patrick opens the door for SpongeBob)
  • SpongeBob: Thanks pal. (Patrick closes the door. SpongeBob rings the doorbell. He appears to be holding a bouquet of flowers)
  • Sandy: Hello?
  • SpongeBob: Hi-ya, Sandy. Its me, SpongeBob!
  • Sandy: Hold on a sec, I'll let you in (An alarm sounds and all the water drains. SpongeBob begins to whistle. SpongeBob stops whistling when he sees the water go down the drain. SpongeBob's arm rolls up into a ball and he blows in a strange way. After a while he bangs on the door)
  • SpongeBob: Sandy! Sandy! Open up! Sandy! Sandy! (Sandy opens the door and SpongeBob falls over. He bounces about in a similar way to how an alive fish would when it has no water)  Sandy, somethings gone terribly wrong. There's no water in...(He stops and looks around) Here.
  • Sandy: Course there's no water. Nutin but air.
  • (SpongeBob tries to grab the air but it doesn't work. Then he sniffs it)
  • SpongeBob: No water?
  • Sandy: That ain't a problem, is it? Hi yah!
  • SpongeBob: Problem? (He laughs) Hi yah! That's how I like my air! (He gasps, coughs and dries out) With no water.
  • Sandy: (Cartwheeling to the center of her treedome) Well, all right. I made Texas tea and cookies. Well, come on in! Hi-yah! (SpongeBob walks forward slowly making squeaking noises) That's not in. In! (SpongeBob walks another few steps with more squeaking noises. Sandy runs to get SpongeBob. She takes his hands and helps him walk to the center of the Treedome) You're a funny little dude. Come on, I'll give you the grand tour. (Scene fades to a shot of the sun coming down on the treedome where SpongeBob and Sandy are sitting) This is my own private little air bubble. This air is the driest... (SpongeBob gasps)...purest...(SpongeBob gasps again)  ...most airiest air in the whole sea. Oh, over there's my birdbath. (Scene cut's the birdbath where a Robin is splashing and chirping in it) And that's my oak tree (SpongeBob suddenly is more focused on the water. SpongeBob waits until Sandy is facing the other way) It provides me with extra air. This dome is made of the strongest polyurethane, that's a fancy name for plastic. Ain't that just the bees knees? Tell you what, weren't easy getting here neither. First, I... (SpongeBob runs to the birdbath and jumps on it gasping loudly. The Robin punches SpongeBob back to it's original spot)  ...that's my treadmill. That's how I stay in tip-top shape. Well, come on. Lets have that tea now. (She does a few karate moves. A knock is heard from outside. It turns out to be Patrick pointing to his pinky)
  • Patrick: Pinky! Pinky!
  • (SpongeBob weakly lifts his pinky up and gasps. Scene fades to SpongeBob sitting on a picnic bench. SpongeBob has now got wrinkles on his face, his mouth is puckered and he has black eyes instead of white. He lifts up a pack of flowers)
  • SpongeBob: (Hoarse voice) I brought you some flowers.
  • (Sandy walks over to SpongeBob)
  • Sandy: For me? How sweet! (Sandy tries to grab them from SpongeBob but SpongeBob refuses to let go. When Sandy finally grabs them a bit of SpongeBob's pinky falls off. He clenches his hand) You ok?
  • SpongeBob: (The black eyes have gone) Yes, I'm OK.
  • Sandy: You know, you're the first sea critter to ever visit.
  • SpongeBob: I cant imagine why.
  • Sandy: Can I get you anything?
  • SpongeBob: Water would be nice.
  • Sandy: I'm gonna to put these in a vase
  • SpongeBob: Take your time. (The door closes. SpongeBob runs to the door gasping heavily. He attemps to open the door but finds it difficult)  I gotta get out of here! Aaaaahh! (He stops and his conscience comes in) 
  • Sandy: (Talking in SpongeBob's head) I like you, SpongeBob. We could be tighter than bark on a tree!
  • (SpongeBob now finds it more difficult)
  • Patrick: (Also talking in SpongeBob's head) When in doubt, pinky up.
  • SpongeBob: (He lifts his pinky in the air with confidence then stands up while victorious music plays) I don't need water! Water's for quitters! I don't need it! I don't need it! I don't need it! I don't need it, I don't need it... (He walks backs to his table and sits down back to his original self while the music stops)
  • Sandy: Why, these flowers are just beautiful! (She sniffs the flowers) They'll last much, much longer in a vase full of ice, cold water. (She puts the vase down onto the table. SpongeBob seems to be more interested in the vase that Sandy) So tell me about yourself (Sandy rests her hand on her chin) It must be fascinating being a sea critter. (SpongeBob is still watching the vase of flowers) SpongeBob? (The timer goes off) Oh, there's the cookies. (She heads inside the tree) Be right back.
  • SpongeBob: (Thinking) ] I don't need it, I don't need it, I definitely don't need it. (Camera cuts to a close up of SpongeBob's face who has completely dried up) I don't need it. (Everytime SpongeBob says this the camera cut's to SpongeBob's face then the vase) I don't need it. I don't need it. I don't need it. (SpongeBob gives in) I NEED IT!!!!!!!! 
  • (SpongeBob shoots up to the ceiling and bounces onto the table like a rocket)
  • Patrick: No, SpongeBob! No, no, no, stop! Pinky! Pinky!
  • SpongeBob: (Drinking the wole vase) I'm a quitter! AAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!! (He screams while running around the dome)
  • (Patrick enters the door running and shuts it)
  • Patrick: You can't leave now! You'll blow it!
  • SpongeBob: (Hanging onto the door) Air is not good, Patrick! Air is not good!
  • (Patrick pulls SpongeBob off the door and drags him)
  • Patrick: You're just being shy. Don't worry, buddy. You're doing fine. (He get's weaker) I wont let you blow...this. (Let's go of SpongeBob and crawls onto the floor coughing and panting. He stands up) WHAT KIND OF PLACE IS THIS?! (He runs to the door and tries to open it) There's no water in here!
  • (SpongeBob runs to join him)
  • SpongeBob: I tried to tell you!
  • Patrick: (Pushing SpongeBob away from the door) We've got to get out of here!
  • SpongeBob: (Tries to grab the handle) You're..doing it...wrong...
  • Patrick: (On the floor) Wait, no! We've got.. to get... out...
  • (Scene fades to the sun. Sandy arrives with Tea and Cookies)
  • Sandy: Come and get it! Y'all gonna like this... (She screams when she see's SpongeBob and Patrick dried out and spills the tea. Scene cuts to a live action Sponge and Starfish on the grass. Scene then cut's to Sandy filling 2 water helmets using a hose and a ladder. SpongeBob and Patrick are leaning against the ladder) There, that ought to do it! If y'all needed water, you shoulda asked. (SpongeBob and Patrick blush. Sandy arrives with 3 cups of tea. Everyone grabs one) I propose a toast, to new friends! (Sandy drinks the tea but when SpongeBob and Patrick drink theirs they hit the helmets causing it to spill) Hold on a second. (She grabs the glasses and puts a tea bag in each helmet full of water so that they can drink from it)  I hope you like your tea strong. Drink up! (Patrick nudges SpongeBob and they both put there pinky up. They all sip the tea)
  • All: Ahhh!

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